Surfing Magazine Music Reviews

Run DMC
Crown Royal
Arista Records
Kid Rock, Fred Durst and Stephan Jenkins of Third Eye Blind all performing with one of rap’s greatest trio? What the hell is this world coming to? Everyone knows that Run DMC rules, which is why they could have easily done without the mediocre ‘rockers’ that they teamed up with on this album. Run DMC threw out a lot of good beats in this album, but most were unfortunately lost in the God forsaken ‘art’ of rap ‘ roll. If you don’t mind skipping around an album to get to the three or four songs that will actually get you going, by all means get this album. A word to Fred Durst: Can we at least get through one song where you don’t flaunt your unsubstantiated band? – Gary Martinez



Weezer
The Green Album
Geffen Records
After ONLY a five-year hiatus, Weezer has finally decided to come out of the woodwork and release their third album. This pop-fueled record definitely distinguishes itself from their prior work with an array of cheery four-chord songs that at times leave the listener hoping for more. Sure, there are a few songs on the album that I just can’t enough of, but there were songs that sounded so similar to each other that I thought I heard the same song twice. This album would rate a ‘B’ on a normal scale, but scores a mediocre ‘C+’ due to the fact it’s Weezer and they could’ve done much better. – Gary Martinez



G. Love and Special Sauce
Electric Mile
Epic Records
Is it possible for these guys to make a bad record? Once again, G. Love has brought us another eclectic basket of songs that will either make you want to go out with your friends to the local speakeasy or just lay back and let the wind blow through your hair. I can’t say this album sticks out compared to his past work, but it is definitely of the same G. Love nature (in case you don’t know, that is good). Perfect for the post-session chill or the next Johnson/Malloy flick. – Gary Martinez



Unloco
Healing
I wanted to bad to dislike these guys for being part of the used up chthonic sound that has spread across the airwaves, and guess what, I did. I have to give these guys credit for breaking out of Austin considering the great amount of competition in the city, but excessive use of drop D tuning combined with Joey Duenas’ Gavin Rossdale like voice proved less than impressive. Ever wondered what that spiky-haired 17-year-old was blasting from his lifted (or lowered, depending on how you’re livin’) and oversized truck? You have your answer. – Gary Martinez

MUSIC PICKS

These are just some quick picks of the good and bad, I'm trying to stay away from the obvious, such as the Beatles', Hendrix, The Clash, etc.

Those on the Good Ship Lollipop...
- DJ Danger Mouse, The Grey Album
- The Arcade Fire, Funeral
- Cursive and most of the bands on Saddle Creek
- Beck (anything by), i.e. Midnight Vultures, Mutations, Odelay
- Os Mutantes (great Brazilian, actually inspired Beck)
- Lyrics Born
- The Unicorns, Who Will Cut Our Hair When We're Gone?
- Jurassic 5
- Air, Moon Safari, Walkie Talkie, 10,000Hz Legend
- Anything by Iron Maiden, Sabbath
- Old Metallica
- The Adolescents
- Bloc Party
- 400 blows
- Deerhoof
- Tommy Guerrero

The Shit Storm...
- Maroon 5
- Clay Aiken
- Ashlee Simpson
- Jet
- Most Bands on MTV
- New Metallica
- Hot Hot Heat

More to come...

Also coming up, book reviews
Women by Charles Bukowski
Einstein's Dreams by Alan Lightman
Bringing Down the House by Ben Mezrich
and much much more.

FOR THOSE WHO TAKE MAXIM MAG SERIOUSLY

Supposedly Stuff Magazine has a fashion consultant or some shit for those guys who just don't know how to dress themselves. Here is a little thing I found while perusing the toilet reader (I was pooping, okay? Leave me alone)...


I FEEL SO BAD FOR THIS GUY...YEAH RIGHT, HE KNOWS WHAT HE'S DOING.

Yeah, check out some of the comments Kelly has for this guy.




How are those 'embroidered jeans progressive yet masculine?' Hey Matt, that's a pretty tight shirt bro, I mean that's progressive. Fuck off Kelly, go live vicariously through Sex and the City since no guy will ever like you. Ever.

If there is any guy out there who actually takes this shit seriously, he probably:
A) Has no penis
B) If he does, will never use it
C) If he uses it, it will be sucked by himself

The guy in the pic, Matt, cannot honestly be respected by anyone, anytime, anywhere. Struggling Actor? Try struggling at everything.

Donnie Darko, Director's Cut

Directed by Richard Kelly



Though I am an extreme advocate of the age of the director and await the arrival of a time when the studio system is not the say all end all of film, I can easily say this director’s cut made me feel emptier though it gave me twenty minutes more film. I am actually glad someone told Richard Kelly to leave a lot of his scenes on the cutting room floor. For being fresh out of film school when writing/directing this film, I commend him for his work in such a groundbreaking picture, but the powers that told him that less is more were definitely right.

The extra film was not necessarily the addition of funny scenes, but a handbook telling us the story rather than leaving the viewer up to their own conclusions. I understand we are in a time where the average viewer couldn’t find Iraq on a map, but holding their figurative hand is not necessary. Perhaps it is because I have seen the original film many times and have read “A Brief History of Tim” from which I have become relatively familiar with the space-time continuum, but for the sake of storytelling I still don’t’ feel that a chapter by chapter account is necessary. Inserting such intertitles as “Artifacts provide the first sign that a Tangent Universe has occurred” is perhaps one of the most novice of storytelling techniques. This and the other chapter segues are much better said through dialogue rather than placing it right in front of the viewer to read. If you are going to have Dr. Monnitoff discuss particular concepts of time-travel with Donnie in original, why not have such simple sayings as “Artifacts…” discussed in conversation or other avenues?

Lengthy scenes and oddly placed intercutting were definitely issues, but the music cues and choices were definitely a little more noticeable. Most evident was the INXS intro (as opposed to Echo and the Bunnymen) which leaves the viewer hyperventilating as they await some sort of syncing between sight and sound. It was the beginning of the movie, but it felt more like the end. Huh, what? I understand that Kelly is playing with concepts of time, but he seemed to forget about the viewer in this case. There were some changes in the sound (both music and mixing) that I enjoyed, but getting off to such a start doesn’t help.

OHHHHH shit, now there is Drew Barrymore. She bugged me in the original and still bugs me now. She plays a pseudo-intellectual who doesn’t deserve the likes of Monnitoff, but guess what neither does the actress. Seeing her fail at playing an annoying and arrogant teacher only makes her more annoying to watch. Granted she produced the film under her company Flower Films, which by the way sounds as though it was name by Liz, a girl in some sorority who was called a hippie by her ‘sisters’ because she wore a flower in her hair and occasionally sits on the floor, but a smart producer would not put themselves in such a role and then come to fail.


GO BACK TO THE WEDDING SINGER

While I realize I have trashed the director’s cut, I still can’t lie, I’m a huge fan of Donnie Darko, the original, and hat e to see the tainting of it. Patrick Swayze still rocked, if not harder, the shots (some new) were great, and the uniqueness of the plot still came through, but definitely in a lengthier more intrusive sense. For fans of the original, don’t look here for something more enlightening, you saw it a long time ago.
-G